Yeah, so, I think I am gonna start my Happy Pills again. I should probably see the doctor about it, but I don’t want to pay the office visit fees. I’ll go back eventually. Probably when I need a refill?
Anyway, I have been so forgetful lately. I forget appointments and forget things that need to be done and I don’t feel like doing anything, but I have to. I have one basket of clothes that I keep spreading out on the bed so I can put them away, and maybe I will put a few items away, but then I end up having to just throw them back in the basket so we can go to bed, so they still sit there in the basket forever. That is one example. And my husband has been asking me lately if anything is wrong when I think I feel fine. But today I am feeling mad. I just am.
Sometimes I think the husband watches too much Married with Children and becomes Al Bundy. Just negative attitude in general, negative feelings in the air. No encouragement of any kind, just brings me down! I am down. I am definitely! Definitely taking my Happy Pills again. They help me think straight! Also, no one thinks I could get a small business loan around here, so I do not want to even talk with anyone about it anymore. I can talk to my one friend about it, but the rest is my husband and his family, and they will not have good things to say. They just won’t. I can find out on my own if there is a chance for a business loan, and if not, then fine, but I don’t want any “I told you so”-s or “I knew you couldn’t get a loan, what were you thinking you lousy trollop!?” Okay, that was exaggerating. But you get the idea.
I also need to start exercising. I love to go walking, but sometimes weather does not permit, and sometimes kids do not permit. So I guess I will have to think of something else, but maybe I can still work in the walking. I have always done best with walking. You know what? I am going to post a pic of me from a long time ago, before marriage and kids, because I used to be HOT! Really I did. I feel like that hot girl is still in there somewhere.
5 comments:
of course your hot girl is still in there somewhere! she needs to come back out! i just tell myself, hey, as long as i can still get a look when i'm out, i still got it. (it bein' my mojo) :) and dammit, i still got it regardless.
Damn girl, you look hot in that outfit. Even tho I'm not really attracted to blondes & I'm also one of these strange guys who isn't really into big boobs, I think you're damn fine. This is just a little note to let you know my T13 is up.
Hey there. I hope that you are feeling better. I have not been to your site for a week or so, and this blog of yours made me sad.
Your picture is beautiful....but so is the main one on your site.
I struggle with depression on a day to day basis and I have to take my HAPPY pill or things "ain't" pretty in my life. Sometimes life just gets you down no matter how you look at it. Being a wife and mom is a full time job and the day to day stuff just starts to grind on ya.
I am sending you my extra happy thoughts....just in case you need a few!
what do you want to do with a small business loan? What kind of business do you want to start?
scouser- thanks man!
maryjane- I want to start a hair salon. I am a hairstylist and I am tired of working under other people's or corporations and their rules. I want to make my own rules. I have the perfect location picked out! Thanks for your happy thoughts. I am feeling better now.
Hey Karen, sorry to hear you're down enough to need to take your happy pills. I've been taking "happy" pills (Effexor) for probably 5 years now so I know how it can get. It's really bad when I miss even a day but I'd rather take them every day and be able to be sane on a regular basis. I hope you feel better and I hope things go well with your business. It may be a lot of work in the beginning but it will be well worth it in the end.
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